Some of us think holding on makes us strong, but sometimes it is letting go.

“I want to grow. I want to be better. You Grow. We all grow. We’re made to grow. You either evolve or you disappear.” — Tupac Shakur

    It has been a minute, or a few years since I posted on my blog.  But let's get into why I am here. Today I saw on Facebook a post about supporting Ben Neely Trauma Support Inc.  Ben Neely is not anyone whom I have ever personally met, however, his story rocked my heart as his sweet momma lost a piece of her.  So I immediately went to the website and signed up to volunteer.   Not long after Ben's mom reached out Via Facebook and I was super excited to hear from her, I am officially going to get to Volunteer at my first BNTS event in November.  Fast Forward to my drive home, having a lot on my heart, head, you name it, and spending the car ride with thoughts flooding my brain. When I got home, I sat in my car, which is a way I like to decompress.  I get back on the good ole Facebook and see that 5 years ago today I shared a very raw part of my life with everyone.  I choose to discuss Claudia's Suicide attempt publicly.

    Why does this matter?  I still struggle each and every day with that one day 5 years ago.  Claudia is great and doing the best she has ever done, I do however struggle daily.  After talking with my sister she mentioned finding something that makes me happy again.  Finding how I can find that piece of me that I need to repair and a way to repair it.  How amazing is it that on the same day, I was reminded of my love of writing AND found an organization to volunteer with and a way to channel this piece of me that needs repairing?

    So where are the Fowlers in life?  Braydon is working his dream job, but not as a police officer.  He is working at the Ruff Life Pet Resort and KILLING it.  

    Claudia is living her best 19-year-old life, spending time with her besties, and boyfriend, and working at the Ruff Life as well.  She continues to work hard towards becoming a Paramedic.

    Shawn is also Killing it at work, continuing to be better than he was the day before and doing his best to ensure that his employees are well cared for and happy!  He is still 100% my best friend and I absolutely love doing life with him!

    What about me?  Well, I made a HUGE change in October leaving my job of 18 years to start a new adventure.  I am the Director of Operations for Primrose Preschool.  I love my new job, my coworkers, and the families.  It was a difficult decision but one that was much needed for my personal growth.   After leaving I was pushed away, deleted, ignored, and accused of things by people that I truly loved.  My mental health declined and it took me a while to find my worth again, but I have learned I create my worth, no one else sets that for me.  I cannot choose how others treat me, I can however make the choice on how I react.  I am slowly rebuilding what was taken from me by those that I trusted and I personally believe I am KILLING it too!!  So let them.........

“Let Them”

“Just Let them.
If they want to choose something or someone over you, LET THEM.
If they want to go weeks without talking to you, LET THEM.
If they are okay with never seeing you, LET THEM.
If they are okay with always putting themselves first, LET THEM.
If they are showing you who they are and not what you perceived them to be, LET THEM.
If they want to follow the crowd, LET THEM.
If they want to judge or misunderstand you, LET THEM.
If they act like they can live without you, LET THEM.
If they want to walk out of your life and leave,
hold the door open, AND LET THEM.

Let them lose you.
You were never theirs, because you were always your own.

So let them.

Let them show you who they truly are, not tell you.
Let them prove how worthy they are of your time.
Let them make the necessary steps to be a part of your life.
Let them earn your forgiveness.
Let them call you to talk about ordinary things.
Let them take you out on a Thursday.
Let them talk about anything and everything just because it’s you they are talking to.
Let them have a safe place in you.
Let them see the heart in you that didn’t harden.
Let them love you. “